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Published On: Tue, Nov 28th, 2017

British Man Beats Neighbor With Piece Of Wood For Loudly Playing A Wham! Song

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Screenshot: YouTube

Geez. Good thing he didn’t play the Goo Goo Dolls, or he might have been killed.

According to the Southern Daily Echo, a 24-year-old Southampton man was recently sentenced to two years in jail for beating the shit out of his girlfriend’s neighbor late last year.

The reason Sam Wickenden “smashed through a balcony wall before repeatedly attacking a neighbor with a plank of wood?” You guessed it – he was sick of that neighbor playing “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” by Wham!

The victim, Jamie Summerton, said the attack at the Canberra Towers on December not only left him with a broken arm but also numerous other injuries that have prevented him from working his “full duties” and being a good father.

“My partner had to help feed me and put my socks on,” Summerton told the court. “I used to work in a pub but I cannot do my full duties. Fortunately, I have been able to find another job where I work at the bar only. My arm aches for long periods, which it didn’t used to do before. My five-year-old daughter doesn’t understand that I sometimes can’t do certain things. My current boss is very understanding, but if he wasn’t, I wouldn’t have a job.”

Not surprisingly, this isn’t the first time Wickenden has been in trouble with the law, as his lengthy rap sheet includes “two cases of affray and drunk and disorderly behaviour in the last five years.” It’s unknown, however, if he would have done the same thing if the Wham! song would have been “Careless Whisper,” or if he would have used it to seduce his girlfriend instead.

And now, I think it’s time we all sing along:

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